When we moved to Ghana, we went as a couple with very different personalities and very different ways of organizing our worlds. We relate differently to others on the team and to local people too. We study language differently. We have different ideas about housing. And so it goes.

We learned to enjoy these and other differences while back in the U.S., but not so during our first few months in Ghana. The stress of our move across cultures magnified our differences ten-fold. If one of us felt out of sorts with the other, the other felt very, very alone.

But we've learned to acknowledge our differences and the tensions they can generate at times like these. We talk about the situation whenever necessary, we check with each other regularly to see how the other is doing and we watch out for circumstances in which we're especially vulnerable.

Better still, we've learned to engage the gospel as a couple. We confess our predisposition to prefer self to the other, remember God's unconditional love for us in Jesus, surrender ourselves afresh to Him, and then heave a sigh of relief when He takes over. When He does, our eyes are opened to what we couldn't see without Him—that the alien landscape of each other's heart is a fascinating world just waiting to be explored, appreciated and treasured. Africa is for lovers—by the grace of God.

Pray

Culture stress is a challenge to even the closest relationships. Please pray that God will help the married missionaries that you know to deal with culture shock.